Two Years Later:
Well not wholly but its just one of those days…
On the surface I have everything. A great job in the Silicon Valley, which only occasionally doesn’t bore the hell out of me. A rented apartment I can call home and can afford easily on my fancy salary. A nice car. Something to do everyday and a boyfriend to come home to, in the house I could call my own.
Its clichéd but I actually met Bill at work. We used to sit across from each other and got talking. Recently separated from my longtime friends, in a town far away from home, a steady, friendly southerner like me, who talked to me with that familiar homely accent, got my jokes and references, liked the same foods…I thought I was in love.
Now it is just familiarity and routine.
Don’t ask me why I haven’t gotten rid of him. I don’t know either.
So here I am, wallowing away in my once a month hormone-induced pity party, swaddled in a fleece blanket, drinking sodas, watching chick flicks and crying along the actress currently in a rough spot. Bill has intelligently left me alone and has gone on his guys’ night out. A pang of jealousy hits me at that. Between late nights at work and keeping up with the housework, I have been shitty at correspondence with my best friends. Not that I have many. The best friends, Pam and Amelia, are my only friends, if we take my work acquaintances out of the picture. So Bill gets to be with his friends and I get to sit on the couch and watch TV alone.
A small part of my logical brain tells me I am the one in the touchy mood and Bill does this every Friday so why bother. He might have stayed for company if I had asked it of him. But I didn’t. I chose instant noodles and soda and chick flicks over my boyfriend…
Fuck the logical part! It is putting a dent in my pity party and I crush it promptly.
My phone rings. It is jumping and flashing all over the coffee table, just out of my reach. Fucker! I glare at it for fifteen whole seconds, putting my jedi powers to test and willing it to rise and land in my lap.
Well apparently, even my jedi powers suck…Life is so unfair!
I fling off the blanket and grumpily from the midst of the comfort nest thing I have going on around me…cushions, sodas, TV remote control, my ipod, my kindle etc etc. How could I leave out the phone on the table?
Well I reach the phone and look who is calling…PAM!!!
“Ohhh look who’s still alive!” she drones…
Uh ho she is pissy… “Hey I work for a living Miss Trust-Fund-Spoiled-Princess!” I respond with mock affront.
“Yeah? You work?” she sighs, “God help the people who buy the software you write!”
“Hey don’t make fun of my job bitch! Only I get to do that!” I chuckle. Finally, my first chuckle of the evening… “How have you been? What are up to these days?”
“ Spoiling myself on the trust fund of course!” I know she is rolling her eyes, “why in the world would I be doing anything else? This is a full time job and I take it very seriously!”
“Amen to that sister.”
“So how are you?”
“You mean apart from weary of carrying the load in blue-collar-ville? Fine fine…”
“Oh no…Tell me all about it.”
“Tell you what?”
“Out with it Stackhouse…I know you have a pity party going in full swing over there. And don’t even try to deny it.”
Now that’s what I mean when I say she is my best friend. She just knows. Thank god for Pam and Amelia. So I settle down in my blanket again and rant about everything. It is really freeing and at the end of half an hour of cussing about everything under the sun, I am finally feeling better about everything. Unlike Bill, who gave up after a couple of attempts at being a patient listener, she of course takes my rants about my boss, a crappy end to my favorite book series, the fucked up murder of my favorite TV series by it’s writers and a recent bout of acne very seriously and patiently listens to everything as I get it out. Again, thank god for friends.
“Well that sucks…”
“Yeah tell me about it. But thanks for lending the ears, Pam. Bill just doesn’t get it. Sometimes I think why I haven’t broken up with him already. All he does is plant his butt in the couch and watch shitty news channels while I cook and clean all around him. You know how long since I had a Bill induced orgasm?”
“Shit! How long girl?”
“A fuckton days Pam. All I can depend on is myself these days. He just doesn’t cut it.”
“Get rid of him Sook.”
“Yeah as soon as I have a couple of hours free of work or a work related headache. It is not going to be pretty. He would not go so easily. I just want to run away.”
“You know that you are sounding like a fucking sixty year old frustrated wife right? You know it right?”
“Hmmmpphhh…I dunno. I am sick of it all. Life sucks.”
“I think you need a break. Tell you what Stackhouse. I am coming to LA for a month to live with my mother and show off the bikinis I bought recently in Paris. We should get together. Take week off and come stay with me. Amelia is coming too.”
Ohh that sounded soooo good. A perk of working my ass off…I get compensatory offs on extra hours. And I easily have a week worth of accumulated compensatory leaves I can take. Looks like I am going on a vacation! Yaaayyyy….
“Tell me when and I’ll be there.”
Pam is squealing…A very UnPam thing to do….Amelia squeals, Pam rolls her eyes…Wow! She must really be excited.
“So what’s the occasion? I know you would not spend a month with your mother in a normal world.”
She sighs. “I have to this time. She’s had a divorce.”
“Ohhh…I am so sorry Pam. Is she ok? What happened?” Pam never talks about her family. She always changes the topic of discussion and we always respected her need to not discuss anything. The fact that she is sharing this news with me is really something.
“Don’t be sorry. I am not. I am relieved actually. My mom and husband number two were never meant to be, however much they tried to stay together. Pity actually. This one was a good catch. A little younger than mom, but good. Successful in his own businesses, good looking, caring, fun. But it couldn’t last.”
Now she has really piqued my curiosity. But asking about such a personal issue with Pam is still awkward. And I wouldn’t have asked if she hadn’t sounded so cavalier about the whole thing.
“Then why did they separate?” I ask carefully.
She chuckles, “You would never believe it.”
“She recently discovered she bats for the other team!”
“Yeah! Pretty much. The divorce was amicable. But she feels she needs to reconnect with me. For some weird reason, she thinks this fiasco is going to traumatize me! She needs to make sure I am doing ok.”
Haaa…Pam? Traumatized? Over a lesbian mom?
“I’m sure you will need a lot of retail therapy over the trauma?”
“Ohh sure” I can practically see her eyes shining in glee at that, “we’ll reconnect alright. With her credit card that is. Ohh and she is also having a break up/good bye party!”
“Ha Ha…That’s the latest fad with her chums these days. She even invited her ex-husband to the party!”
“Oh My God…” That’s fucked up. And it would be one hell of a spectacle to witness. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world Pam.” I laugh, “Just tell me when and I’ll be there. I wanna see what a break-up party looks like.”
“I knew you are too fucking curious for your own good! Amelia had the same curiosity. Frankly, I really need you guys here, to get over all the fucked up shit my mom is going to pull. Can you believe we are talking about a lady who is my mom here? I knew I was right in hiding my family from you.”
I laugh again. “Well she does sound…uhh..unique.”
“Unique doesn’t even cover it. So, first of June works for you? The party is on the third. Amelia is coming over a little earlier.”
“Yeah that’s fine. I’ll apply for leaves then. I’ll drive my car so no air tickets necessary.”
“Goody! See you then…Luv ya sis…”
“Ohh I love you too hon…see ya…”